This actually gets more difficult as he got older, because kids keep secrets all the time, so we also made an agreement that we will respect the privacy of anyone telling him a secret. Teaching/Telling kids to lie or withold information from the other parent is terrible. Several years ago, in Asheville, NC, Buncombe County Child Protective Services rescued an 11-year-old boy who was being molested by both his grandparents and his parents… He asked me to keep that a secret. Like when I discovered that my father was writing child support checks, making copies to use in court, and then throwing the checks away without sending them to my mother. How to tell if someone is preying on your trust, taking advantage of your situation & innocent child. They may encourage your kids to keep secrets from you or to lie to you. The short answer is no, a parent can never stop a child from visiting the other parent unless the child is in immediate danger, or the court issues a court order approving this modified custody arrangement to exclude custody or visitation by one parent. For example, your child may refuse to tell you what he did with dad last weekend, and may even say "Dad said not to tell you," or "Dad said to keep it a secret." Child grooming techniques a child predator uses you need to know. We had a similar incident last Christmas. Particularly venomous grannies will tell them demeaning things about you with the ultimate purpose of turning your kids against you. Alternatively, says a mom named Rebecca, try to get your child's buy-in on telling the other parent. Be wary of secrets your child has with the other parent, including code words or signals. Keep the incident confidential, and if you share it with someone who must know (such as the other parent), do so in private, away from your child. Toxic grandparents may love their grandchildren. Can a parent keep a child away from the other parent following a divorce? Custodial Interference Can Backfire. How to spot a Child Predator: Red Flags of a Pedophile. 10. They may mean them no harm. Sometimes we might keep a surprise secret from one or the other of us, like presents, but if somebody asks him to “keep a secret” he has to tell one of us. Telling Your Child Critical or Hurtful Things. For example, one parent might try to get their child to keep secrets from the other. Makin False Accusations of Abuse A parent may go as far as making false accusations of sexual, physical or emotional abuse against the other parent. A Child Predator is hiding in plain sight - they look just like you and me. Sometimes, one parent will alienate a child from the other parent out of anger, desire for revenge, jealousy, feelings of betrayal, rejection, etc. when one parent tells a child to purposely lie, or hide issues or problems from the other parent, and it is a form of abuse it is called "parental alienation syndrome" and can get the children taken from the parent who is telling the children to lie to the other in almost all 50 states. The other parent might not be angry at all but, such accusations can cause a child to have unfounded hard feelings toward the other parent.
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